I am being unfaithful. I’m cheating on my novel with my blog. Kind of like Charles and Camilla. I know it’s wrong but I just can’t stop myself from going back……
I’m going to have to leave the Royal family analogy now though as part of the reason I have returned to my blog is vanity. Yes, it turns out my artistic ego is not above swelling in response to gentle massage. Over the last few days several people told me that they liked my blog. One person also told me that some of my posts weren’t very good but we’ll leave that aside for now. It’s nice to receive compliments. So far although I have produced over 10,000 words of top quality crime-fiction nobody has told me they like my book. Admittedly nobody has been allowed to read my book so far, indeed the rules of NaNoWriMo even prohibit me from reading my own work back as I’m not supposed to edit anything. This is proving awkward as I have now forgotten the names of two minor characters.
Blogging about my novel is completely acceptable though. Indeed I’ve learned over the last week that the most important component to being a writer is to talk about your writing, once people stop listening you should start writing about writing, but don’t actually write anything, unless it’s about writing.
A lot of people have wondered how I have the time to write a book. So far I have claimed that I don’t know. However I’ve given this some thought and obviously I must know as I am doing it. So I’ve compiled a short list:
Things I have given up in order to write my novel:
- Reality television (apart from the Apprentice and Strictly come dancing)
- Baths (please don’t be alarmed, I am still washing frequently, however I have exchanged my hour-long bath for a very quick shower)
- Conversation with my husband. There is this skinny blonde guy who lives in my house, the children seem fond of him but I can’t quite place him
- Baking, sadly I have gained 10lbs since the summer so this is a blessing
- My blog (ahem)
- Reading – I am still allowing myself ten minutes before I go to sleep at night but I am rendered so intellectually stunted by my incessant writing and lack of reality television that I have debased myself to the level of re-reading the 50 shades of grey trilogy – yes I know this is weird, let’s move on.
- Computer games – fortunately Allan has taken on the onerous task of caring for our virtual dragon farm, what would I do without him?
- Sleep – is for losers
- Any form of exercise – see above
- Photography – sorry no pictures!
So there you have it. Anybody can write a book as long as you are willing to ignore your husband, stop washing, exercising and sleeping and only eat ready meals. In fact I’m finding it so easy I’ve taken on a really complicated knitting project as well.